That window period is closing…

“Isn’t that concert on Saturday?”

(The Rock on the Lawns concert is on Saturday in Johannesburg. This is the concert that features The Cure. Remember I mentioned it here, here and here?)

“Yes,” I replied to my friend as we were driving home.

“You haven’t heard from him?”

“No,” I said in reply.

“The one opportunity he had, he has missed, and the window period is closing,” she said shaking her head.

“What do you mean?” I asked being pulled out of my thoughts,

“I was hoping he would call and ask you to go with him, and then you two would have realised that you missed one another and would get back together.”

“Life isn’t a movie,” I answered, “because that only happens in the movies, besides why would you want to spend the day with an ex-girlfriend?” [Although I wanted to add FWB.]

“But you two were great together. I really thought he was brighter than most men, it seems not,” she said shaking her head again.

She continued: “I feel sorry for him, he let something good go, but I get the feeling he is being influenced from a third party.”

I shrugged my shoulders.

Maybe she was right… maybe that’s why I gave him the tickets (read the post here). Maybe I was hoping he would reach out, maybe that’s why I was so hurt about the tweet earlier this month (read the post here) but as I have hurt him, so he has hurt me, it is a vicious circle and that is why I blocked him in the first place… because I could not take the hurt anymore.

But… I didn’t block him from WhatsApp… and last week I saw this on his status:

I didn’t reply. I didn’t say anything. I just went on with my life, knowing that the tickets I spent my hard-earned cash (*see footnote) on was being advertised that way.

I was asked by my Mom why I gave Phil the tickets. Well… I wanted Phil to have them so that he could experience(**see footnote) something special. The idea was that I was going to experience it with him, but alas… I was planning for months and even told an acquaintance at the club about it and all my co-workers. I was so excited to give it to him. I suppose I was trying to do good, because I felt he needed a bit of time to be spoilt and just get lost in the music, especially since he had gone through a rough time in December. I suppose it was just never meant to be. Somewhere in all that my Mom said that I was a good person, adding that I was better than her, she would have kept the tickets, birthday present or not.

Anyways, I have to live through reminders of the fact that the concert is on Saturday. The programme was posted on Twitter at the end of Feb (see below) so I unfollowed the events company, but I am sure it changed due to the changes in time. It was advertised on TV last night, and for the last two days Computicket has sent messages pertaining to the event, which I forward to Phil.

On the 15th it will be two months (since the break up) and in that time, Phil could have contacted me. He didn’t. Even though I wrote: “I hope you find what you are looking for”. The window was always there. It was a matter for us both to swallow our pride and stubbornness and send that first message, which wasn’t a meme or silly joke, but a “can we maybe talk?” message.

Like my friend said: “That window period is closing and once it is closed, I know you will move on. No matter what he does then, he won’t be able to come back.”

She is right about that. After all, after the concert I have no reason to be in contact with him again.

So to end of this post, here is your “Tuesday Tune” on a Wednesday by one of my favourite artists who will be performing on Saturday.

Aeroplane Jane
Karen Zoid

We’ll say goodbye, I boarded at gate 9
You phoned again, while I stood there in the line
She gave me a hand and showed me to my seat
Alas, woe is to me, no place for my feat

Quietly I go insane in this lonely aeroplane
Everybody looks the same on this lonely aeroplane
And the strange man next to me, don’t excuse me when he sneeze
Someone come and save me please, I think that he just cut the cheese

You’re a million miles away and I miss you so today
Silently I go insane in this lonely
Aeroplane Jane, Aeroplane Jane
Aeroplane Jane’s gone insane

As I lose my sense of reality
You are still my only memory
As I lose a
As I lose a sense of reality
As I lose a
As I lose a sense of
‘Cause I’m about to go insane
On this lonely aeroplane
Everybody looks the same
On a lonely aeroplane
And the in-flight magazine advertise washing machines
All your clothing stays pristine when you wash with a machine

You’re a million miles away and I miss you so today
Silently I go insane in this lonely
Aeroplane Jane, Aeroplane Jane
Aeroplane Jane’s gone insane

Serve the coffee and the tea
Same man don’t say thank you, don’t say please
You’re a million miles away and I miss you so today
Quietly I go insane in this lonely aeroplane
You’re a million miles away and I miss you so today
Quietly I go insane in this lonely aeroplane

 

 

 

 

____________________

*I live from payday to payday and I am the only breadwinner in the house, I don’t just have money to throw around on luxuries, so that status message did hurt. R 1 000 doesn’t sound like a lot but I budgeted for months, for something that I am not going to even enjoy. I was told that I should have requested the money for the one ticket I gave him. Why should someone else have the luxury of going to a concert with a ticket I paid for? Well, I know he doesn’t have that kind of cash either, so why bother?

**Making memories. Come to think of it if my brother, Timothy, was still around I wouldn’t have given the tickets to Phil. I would have had someone to go with, but my music person is gone. Anyways I just wanted a good memory to take with me when I depart this world one day. That’s what life is about… memories.

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Divine intervention

So, I refer to my “friend-zone” post from last week… between you and me, I was ranting… I think I was just a little sick and tired of being used as an agony aunt by a certain “potential” beau. The man who only seems to contact me when he needs someone to listen.

This morning in church, I give you a guess what a part of the service was about?

FRIENDS.

Yes… can you believe it? Divine intervention.

I did feel very guilty about my rant… because a true friend listens and assist where they can. The only thing is that it is a two-way street and should be 100% from both sides.

So, I have given it some thought… AGAIN!

My decision is: I will be a good friend to the people who deserve it!

Have a happy Sunday further.

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A new adventure

I haven’t been around in a while and I do apologise, I have been quite busy. With what? Yes, I can hear you asking and my answer is with this:

SNAPS AND SHOOTS

I decided to launch my very own “business”. It is something that I have been wanting to do for a while now, but finally decided that enough was enough and I would launch it… I have decided to focus on:

  • Kiddies shoots;
  • Family shoots;
  • Matric Farewells;
  • Engagement shoots;
  • Corporate functions;
  • Family reunion; and
  • the odd wedding or two.

I will offer various shoots at various locations and I will cater for couples, friends, groups, families, pets and so much more.

You will see by my opening specials that I am not as expensive as other photographers out there and well, I will run with it for a few months and see how it goes. I do hope for the best where all this is concerned.

Anyways, so if I am really quiet, you all will know where to find me. You are all welcome to pop on over to the site (which will get more and more posts as time goes on) and say hi. I will be finishing the facebook page tonight so you can pop over there too. I’ll post the link as soon as I have it.

Take care and chat soon,
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Tuesday Tune: I’m already there

I’m Already There
Lonestar

He called her on the road
From a lonely cold hotel room
Just to hear her say I love you one more time
But when he heard the sound
Of the kids laughing in the background
He had to wipe away a tear from his eye
A little voice came on the phone
Said “Daddy when you coming home”
He said the first thing that came to his mind

I’m already there
Take a look around
I’m the sunshine in your hair
I’m the shadow on the ground
I’m the whisper in the wind
I’m your imaginary friend
And I know I’m in your prayers
Oh I’m already there

She got back on the phone
Said I really miss you darling
Don’t worry about the kids they’ll be alright
Wish I was in your arms
Lying right there beside you
But I know that I’ll be in your dreams tonight
And I’ll gently kiss your lips
Touch you with my fingertips
So turn out the light and close your eyes

I’m already there
Don’t make a sound
I’m the beat in your heart
I’m the moonlight shining down
I’m the whisper in the wind
And I’ll be there until the end
Can you feel the love that we share
Oh I’m already there

We may be a thousand miles apart
But I’ll be with you wherever you are

I’m already there
Take a look around
I’m the sunshine in your hair
I’m the shadow on the ground
I’m the whisper in the wind
And I’ll be there until the end
Can you feel the love that we share
Oh I’m already there
Oh I’m already
There

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My Irish birthday party… (a quick summary)

I am so tired… I have obviously learned that a 30-year-old body doesn’t quite recover as quickly as a 29-year old body… Hahaha see I made a joke about my new age. 😉

This weekend just flew by, but they say time flies when you are having fun and it sure did. On Friday, my Mom and I took a day’s leave to start on preparations for my party. On Saturday we did the final touches for the party and at 14:00 some of my friends started arriving for the party. I only got home at about 01:30 the next morning.

Some highlights for the party include:

  • Having my blog friends, Harmony and Asian, at my party. Thanks so much for being there you two. It was awesome having you both there and my family only have really nice things to say about you guys. 🙂
  • My brothers invited their some of their biker friends. The friends made me an honorary member for the day and I was told that I “officially” have another two brothers who will look after me (I’d better add them to my who’s who list).
  • It was awesome socialising with my colleagues out of the office.
  • My Mom, the star who looked after everyone and made them feel welcome.
  • The gifts I received. See the photo below.
  • The cupcakes. We iced them in the colours of the Irish flag and I made clovers to put on them. See the photo below.

One thing I will NEVER do again is order balloons. I must admit now, that I am scared of balloons… I was small when one popped in my face and to this day, I get terrified when they burst. So it was total insanity on my part to order 10 helium balloons from our local Spar and to drive with said balloons to the venue. NEVER AGAIN. I was literally on edge while I was driving because the bloody balloons would not stay in the back of the car.

Anyways, I am sure everyone had a good time with enough to eat. I am going to load the pics on Facebook soon.

As for yesterday, we had to go back to the venue to get the rest of the stuff we left there. By last night I was totally beat and ended up in bed at 21:00. Which is early for me. Thank goodness I already watched the MNet Sunday night movie, so I didn’t miss anything.

We have a big week ahead here at work, so I’ll try to blog when I get the chance to share other experiences with you.

Enjoy your week and take care.
xxx

Kathleen's 30th birthday party 1

The presents I received. These do not include the awesome gifts from Tuesday. 🙂

Kathleen's 30th birthday party 2

The clover cupcakes we made in the colours of the Irish flag. 🙂

The end of a chapter…

Monday was a very difficult day. See, the funeral service of our family friend took place in the same church as my Dad. The coffin was exactly the same as my Dad’s. It took me right back to the day, when my Mom and I and our family were sitting in the first few benches of the church.  Yes, there were a lot of similarities, except the fact that my Father was cremated and our friend was buried. I admit, I was emotional and that seemed to worry my Mom. I told her after that it just hit close to home. Yesterday she (my Mom) even told my brother, Rugby Man how emotional I was about it and he said to her, of course it would be emotional for me, our family friend was like an uncle to me and that’s why I saw so many similarities.

Anyway, don’t you think it is sad how funerals always bring people together in the saddest of circumstances? Especially when you see people who you haven’t seen in a long time.

After the service you won’t believe how man how many people I saw that I knew. People who knew my Mom and knew me when I was small. I had so many people say what a lovely woman I have turned out to be. We had conversations about our families and theirs. I even had an odd experience. I saw a lady who I last saw when I was seven year’s old at my brother’s (Rugby Man’s) wedding. She asked if I am married yet, and when I said no, she said there is a still lot of time. She only got married at 37 and had her first child at 40. See, so there is lots of time to still settle down one day… however, is it only me or do other single people out there get annoyed with questions like this? LOL!

Anyways, back to my tale of Monday… Off to the cemetery we went in a rush. I admit I had to race a little as we were late because of all the chatting to our friends at the church. We got there in time, as the metro cops who were leading the procession, were leaving.

Now, the last time we were at the cemetery was when they put the updated tombstone on my grandparents’ Oupa and Ouma L’s (my Mom’s parents) grave four years ago. My Gran (Ouma L) was cremated, but they placed her ashes with my grandfather (Oupa L). I had to pass my grandparent’s grave to get to our friends. The whole grave side ceremony took place. The ashes to ashes, dust to dust part, and that was very emotional. I luckily never had to go through the placing of the coffin in the ground part with my Dad or Ouma L.

After that, once again, we met up with people who we didn’t see the church. The bereaved family, the boys and girls I grew up with, family friends. I even saw one of my friends who I last saw when I was 16. He approached me and as it turns out, we have been in close proximity to one another and we didn’t even know. His younger brother and my nephews are friends. Small world isn’t it?

Monday was a sad and yet joyous occasion all rolled into one. It was as if people didn’t want to leave. And looking back at it now, that is how our friend would have wanted it. He would have been glad that he brought everyone together. And like I said before… we’ll see them all one day. So it isn’t goodbye, it’s see you later. 🙂

Anyways, I thought I’d just share this, a recap of what happened, and what I was feeling. Please make sure to visit tomorrow, I have some VERY big plans. *Wink wink*

Have a good day.